Try Forgiveness

It is interesting as we approach these final chapters of this text that the author discusses forgiveness in a book about hardship. Sometimes in these past weeks, the chapter content seem not to speak to me as some of the others. Forgiveness is not something that comes easy to me but at the same time I do not grow bitter towards people for wrongs done.
"Recently I chatted with a man who was nervous, physically ill, and disturbed emotionally. I felt he should visit a specialist, but he wanted to talk with me, so I patiently listened. As his stow came out, I began to understand why he was so miserable: he was long on memory and short on forgiveness. He remembered every unkind thing anybody had ever said or done to him. At times his eyes blazed with murderous anger. Once more I was reminded of the importance of forgiveness as one of the greatest spiritual medicines in all the world.
Mark Twain is best known for his humorous stories, but he could be a philosopher when he wanted to be. One of the most beautiful things he ever said was, "Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that crushed it." Forgiveness is not easy, but it is necessary. An unforgiving spirit doesn't hurt the other person; it hurts us." (p. 118).
A while ago, I carried around a braille note taking device. It was for school, but I carried it everywhere. It has been over two years since I carried it and friends asked where my computer was when they saw me because I do not carry it with me anymore. Well, I typed everything on there. How I felt, what others said, wrongs done against me, I recorded it all. I am not even sure why I did that then. I was surely quite miserable during that time. There are certain things we just need to forget. There are things we need to let go. Unforgiveness is like a bitter poison that digs deep. So what does an unforgiving spirit look like?
"When you have an unforgiving spirit, you think you are better than other people. They make mistakes, but you never make mistakes. When you have an unforgiving spirit, you are supersensitive; you take veW personally what other people say and do. You become suspicious of their motives and you feel that somebody is going to hurt you. An unforgiving spirit causes a person to withdraw into himself and become a spectator in life, not a participant. After all, when you are better than other people and they are out to get you, why get friendly? This explains why unforgiving people are usually lonely, critical, newous people.
But one of the saddest results of an unforgiving spirit is the buildup of aggression on the inside. Many people who carry grudges and harbor malice are filled with hostility. They are unable to laugh off the little problems that people sometimes cause; they take these matters seriously and build them into big issues. If somebody pushes ahead of them on the bus, they take it personally and declare war. If nobody really causes any trouble, the unforgiving people can usually imagine something and invent a problem to fight about. (p. 118).
Aggression, bitterness, pride, critical, lonely, these are some of the symptoms. I can remember a friend in college. She was very argumentative. We had on a few times discussed some Bible passage and she would begin by asking me a question and five minutes into the discussion she would begin aggressively disagreeing and increasingly getting angry until it became a one-sided conversation because whatever I said she would not accept. I often grew uncomfortably silent around here and feared having anykind of conversation with her. Angry people are some of the most difficult to be around. The other big characteristic is the critical spirit. The suspicion, negativity, judgmental pride in relating to others. Unforgiving people are paranoid and have nothing positive to say about anyone or anything. The glass is half full and the world is unkind. Certainly personal experience plays a role in this, but I think forgiveness is so key to spiritual health.
"I recall counseling with a lady who was gifted at finding fault with others. But she was unable to see any needs in her own life. Patiently I talked with her, and the longer we talked, the clearer it became to me that her judging of others was really a mask to hide herself. Finally I asked her if there was not some great disappointment in her life that pained her; and then she broke down and cried, admitting that there was. There was an old wound that she had never permitted God to heal. It had festered all those years and poisoned her system. Once she admitted it to herself, and then confessed it to God, it was healed. And once she was forgiven, she was able to forgive others.
This is what Paul meant when he wrote, "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you" (Eph. 4:32). On the cross Jesus prayed, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." Because He shed His blood, you and I can experience God's gracious forgiveness. There is no way we can earn His forgiveness; it is a gift. When you turn to Christ in faith, confess your need, and ask for His forgiveness, He grants it to you unconditionally If He does all this for us, should we not be able to forgive others?" (p. 120).
This is the key to forgiveness. It is found at the cross. Forgive as God has forgiven us. It is simple. The doctrine of salvation is easy enough for a child to understand, yet the author points out we can know it but not let our hearts accept it. Some of the most loving and forgiving people I know are ones who deeply understand what it means to be forgiven by God. He forgave us of a debt we could never pay off. The author offers some ideas on how to cultivate a forgiving spirit.

"By realizing what a great sinner he really is! Perhaps we aren't guilty of some of the gross sins that we see in other people, but we may have committed them in our hearts. At the end of his life, Paul called himself the "chief of sinners." The closer we get to the light, the dirtier our hearts and hands become. So the first suggestion I have for cultivating a forgiving spirit is to spend time daily with the Lord in His Word and in prayer. Get to know Him better. As you do, you will realize what sin really is, and you will discover that there are areas that still need help.
And as you fellowship daily with the Lord, you will discover how loving and gracious He is, and what it cost Him to forgive you. One reason why Jesus instituted the Lord's Supper was to remind us that He died for us. I cannot conceive of a person coming to the Lord's Table and going away with an unforgiving spirit. When we realize the meaning of the cross, we have to forgive others.
Here is a third suggestion: let the Holy Spirit within you generate the kind of love that it takes to forgive others. The fruit of the Spirit is love. You and I cannot manufacture forgiveness; it is something God does within us as we vield to Him. Confess your unforgiving spirit to God; ask Him to forgive you and fill your heart with His love. (p. 121).
Fellowship with the Lord, get to know Him, realize what a great sinner we are and how holy God is. Like Isaiah who saw the Lord recorded in Isaiah 6, he saw how unclean he is before a holy God. These are things we can do. What does Jesus do?
Three days from the Colorado incident, many are still touched by this tragedy. It just does not make sense. Some have grown bitter, some fearful about what is going on in the world now. It is easy to become closed, untrusting, and afraid. Yet, this morning's ODB really encouraged me about the words of Jesus concerning troubled times and how we can approach these moments.
Troubled Times July 23, 2012
Our Daily Bread is hosted by Les Lamborn

READ: John 16:25-33

In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world. —John 16:33
If you’ve never heard of Murphy’s Law, you’ve probably experienced it: “If anything can go wrong, it will.”
Murphy’s maxim reminds me of the principle Jesus shared with His disciples when He told them, “In this world you will have trouble” (John 16:33 NIV). In other words, we can count on it—sooner or later we will hit troubled times. It’s not the way God originally intended life to be, but when the human race first succumbed to Satan’s seduction in the garden, everything on this planet fell into the grip of sin. And the result has been disorder and dysfunction ever since.
The reality of trouble in life is obvious. It’s the reality of peace that often eludes us. Interestingly, when Jesus warned His followers about trouble, in the same breath He also promised peace. He even told them to “be of good cheer, I have overcome the world” (v.33). The word overcome indicates a past event that has a continuing effect. Not only did Jesus conquer the fallen world through His death and resurrection, but He continues to provide victory, no matter how much trouble we may face.
So, although we can expect some trouble in this fallen world, the good news is that we can count on Jesus for peace in troubled times. —Joe Stowell
Dear Lord, thank You for always being with us.
We ask that when troubles invariably come,
You would renew in us once again the blessed
peace of Your presence. Amen.
In the midst of troubles, peace can be found in Jesus.