September 20, 2012
All the Way Down to the Top
Today is Thursday, and it is just another day. Nothing planned, nothing to look forward to. My parents took Daniel for a morning walk and I decided to join them. My dad pushed my chair, while my mom pushed Daniel in the stroller. Daniel wanted to walk for a little while so he walked next to my mom. Then, dad had an idea to have me hold Daniel in my lap while dad pushed my wheelchair. Daniel really liked that. One middle-age lady passing by commented by saying "three generations?". Mom commented after the lady left and said "I wish". I too wish I was taking my baby boy out for a walk, but the child is not mine. Daniel is 18 months and at age 31, having an 18 month old is not inconceivable. In church there are a couple of nine year old girls and my dad picks them up for church since the parents work. It is also possible that the girls could be my children had I married straight out of college. Sometimes when we take four children, one sits in the front since our car has three seats in the front and three in the back. The oldest sits with us in the front and asks questions about a lot of things. In these times, and when I held Daniel while during our morning walk, I wish I have the perminant joys of being a parent and not the temporary and illusionary ones. One difficulty in not being able to see myself as God sees me is that no woman in the United States, in the three cities where I have lived ever had romantic feelings for me. Fourteen years, three cities, four degree programs, thousands of women in their late teens and 20s. Statistically speaking, every one of my programs were female dominated (English literature, sociology, social work, and education). I have come to the conclusion therefore that there is no woman in the United States, possibly Canada or anywhere in the western world who wants to be with a man who was born sight impaired. It is harder to find out about non-western countries since I haven't the financial resources to go. I am on some e-mail lists for blind discussions and this is a huge problem for the blind population. We face high unemployment numbers and low rates of marriage because of a persistent discrimination and lack of integration to participate fully in the practice of being human.
This morning I began with such a simple and short prayer as God's love and care seems less and less real to me in this season of my life. Before I got out of bed I prayed that I would experience God's care today. At night often I tell Him that I feel very isolated, alone, and as though I have no support while going through this health challenge. Early in the evening today, nearly 5:00, I got an e-mail asking if I wanted to have dinner. Random e-mails are always the best e-mails and often it is the workings of the Holy Spirit and His timliness. I agreed and we went to Happy Corner because we haven't gone there in a while and I like restaurants with positive names. With my health condition, it is always good to be outside not only for fresh air and sunlight, but simply to be around other people. There was nothing magical about the food or the restaurant, but being out with my friend had a restorative and positive effect on my health. God powerfully answered my prayer this morning and I experienced His care in a real way.
"RECENTLY I was leading a prophetic training session at a ministry - school. We began the class by talking about the primary purpose of prophetic ministry and started to share that our first priority as a prophetic person is to find the treasure God has hidden in the life of each and every person He has created. In the middle of telling them that we are to "discover and call out the greatness that the Lord had hidden in the lives of people," one of the pastors joined us from another room. I had never met him before and I was unaware at the time that he was part of the leadership team.
Before I could go on, he said, "I have a question for you."
"Okay," I responded, "what is it?"
"I think God is great," he said.
"Yeah, and.. .did I say something that made you think I don't believe that God is great? "I asked.
"You said that people are great.' I think you are teaching a doctrine that promotes pride in people by trying to discover the greatness that is in them," he continued.
I was becoming just a little "fried," so I responded,"I believe that religion emasculates and castrates people in the name of humility!"
We were sitting in a room that had a beautiful picture on the wall next to us. I pointed to the painting and said to him, "Let's pretend that you were the artist who painted that picture."
"Okay," he said, looking a little uptight.
I motioned to the picture and yelled, "What a stupid-looking painting! Those colors are terrible! That thing is so ugly!" I paused for a minute. "Now," I said to him, "does demeaning the painting somehow glorify the artist?"
"No!" he answered.
Now I had him cornered, so I continued, "Not only is God Himself the one who painted us, so to speak, but Jesus was the one who sat in the chair and modeled for the masterpiece! Remember, we were made in God's image and in His likeness. We didn't create ourselves. God created us.We are the work of His hands.When we tear ourselves down we aren't being humble, we are being stupid!"
He looked stunned. He said, "I have three theological degrees, yet I've never been taught this."
I don't know where to start. There is something to be said about a person with three theological degrees. At the same time, this is a very interesting point here. God is great Versus people are great. Are we fostering pride in people when we show them they are great? One side would have pointed to the fact that we have fostered so much self-esteem in this current generation that they have a false sense of confidence and a real problem of selfishness. There is a lot of pride in the younger generation today. Which is not to say that there are not broken and abused children. I choose the author's side that we need to value people as God does. He created each person in His image. He placed so much value in people that He would ultimately die for humanity to save and redeem us. We are the work of His hands. I know this in my head. I have a tough time transfering this to my heart.
"We were created to share God's glory and bring Him glory. After all, who is greater—a king over a bunch of bozos, or a king over a great army of confident soldiers who take pride in serving their king? Isn't it true that the greatness of the King's subjects actually glorify the King Himself?
The account of King Nebuchadnezzar's dream in the fourth chapter of Daniel shows us that learning humility doesn't mean we have to think of ourselves negatively. In the dream Nebuchadnezzar sees an angel cut down a huge tree, leaving only the stump. Daniel, his most trusted dream interpreter, tells him that the dream is about him. He is the tree, and he is about to get cut down because of his pride. Daniel urges the king to humble himself before God humbles him.
Twelve months later, Nebuchadnezzar is on the roof of his castle talking to himself about how awesome he is to have accomplished so much by himself. Suddenly he loses his mind. He is driven into the fields and lives like an animal for seven years. Finally, after seven long y7ears of complete insanity7, God restores his mind. The first statement out of his mouth when he can finally7 talk again is stunning:
At that time my reason returned to me. And my majesty and splendor were restored to me for the glory of my kingdom, and my counselors and my nobles began seeking me out; so I was reestablished in my sovereignty, and surpassing greatness was added to me (Daniel 4:36).
If we didn't know better, wouldn't we think that this was the kind of statement that provoked God to humble him in the first place? Once again, he is saying,"I am awesome!" But look at the next verse! He says, "Now I, Nebuchadnezzar, praise, exalt and honor the King of heaven, for all His works are true and His ways just, and He is able to humble those who walk in pride"' (Dan. 4:37).
Did you get that? King Nebuchadnezzar is saying that he's awesome, but God is more awesome. God's problem with Nebuchadnezzar was not his greatness, but his taking all the credit for it without acknowledging that God gave him his kingdom in the first place."
Learning humility can be a very difficult thing. One of the first verses that ever stood out to me was that God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. We see that also in this passage. King Nebuchadnezzar was made low when he praised himself but God restored him when he learned to honor God. At first glance it is hard to notice the difference. It is subtle. One form of self-praise is without God, but other kind attributes God as the source of glory and life. It is a little like a superstar basketball player who makes the winning shot and in the post-game interview gives the glory to God. God gets the glory in the end. I need to examine myself to see whether or not my accomplishments honor God or they glorify myself. It is a subtle difference but sometimes I can get caught with the wrong attitude.
"God has given the church a great call, and therefore it takes great people to accomplish it. If we fail to see our greatness, we will fall short of our call. Our pauper mentality and false humility have rendered much of the Church ineffective by diminishing our vision for the influence we are meant to have in the world. We can see this in the way we have perceived and pursued the Great Commission. In Matthew 28, Jesus gives us instructions on how worldwide revival is to take place: It is to begin with believers making disciples of the nations. We have reduced our Lord's Great Commission down to something we are more comfortable with, which is ministering to individuals rather than nations.We will talk more about this later. We usually target economically poor and broken individuals over individuals with influence and status. Our insecurity causes us to feel disqualified to reach the rich, educated, and powerful.
Scripture describes men and women of God who took hold of the positions of influence that had been offered to them and recognized that God was strategically placing them there.Their greatness was not for their own benefit, but to give the world a taste of the Kingdom of God. Today, where are the people like Joseph who will become a "father" to the Pharaohs of the world and see whole nations fall into the hands of God? (See Genesis 45.) What has happened to the Elijahs who confronted kings and changed history with their prophetic proclamations? What has become of people like Daniel, who stood in the courts of four worldly kings and won the most powerful nations of the time to God? Why aren't the Nehemiahs of our day around to rebuild our ruined cities? Why is it that giants such as abortion, homosexuality, racism, crime, and corruption are continually allowed to roam the earth and Wreak havoc on our children while the people of God cower behind Pews, hoping our government will pass a law to stop the big guys?
"It is essential that the Body of Christ gets free from an ungodly, low self-esteem.We see throughout Scripture that when people get an identity change from God, they are catapulted into the destiny that once eluded them.
Gideon was a young man who was destined to change the course of history. Like most of us, his low self-esteem had promoted a false humility in him that reduced his life down to simply making a living. His story reads:
The angel of the Lord appeared to him and said to him, "The Lord is with you, 0 valiant warrior." Then Gideon said to him, "0 my lord, if the Lord is with us, why then has all this happened to us? And where are all His miracles which our fathers told us about, saying, 'Did not the Lord bring us up from Egypt?' But now the Lord has abandoned us and given us into the hand ofMidian." The Lord looked at him and said, "Go in this your strength and deliver Israel from the hand ofMidian. Have I not sent you?" He said to Him, "OLord, how shall I deliver Israel? Behold, my family is the least in Manasseh, and I am the youngest in my father's house" (Judges 6:12-15).
The angel knows that Israel's deliverance rests on his ability to impact Gideon's self-esteem. Like Gideon, many of us are fed up with the evils that surround us, yet it hasn't occurred to us that the miracle we have been praying for already lies within us.When God called him a "valiant warrior," Gideon was able to step into an identity that allowed him to bring about the justice that his heart yearned for. It is important for us to realize here that although it appeared that the Midianites were Israel's oppressors, the real bondage lay inside of Gideon.
His response to the angel gives us insight into the actual source of Gideon's fear. He said, "Is my family not the least in Manasseh and I am not the youngest?" His problem isn't so much that the enemy is so big but that he feels so small. You can always tell the size of a man's identi ty by the size of the problem it takes to discourage him."
"Humility isn't thinking less of ourselves but thinking of ourselves less.
True humility is born out of an awareness of God's greatness, grows in a heart full of gratitude, and matures in the awe of His passionate love for us. Prayer is an act of humility because the person who prays acknowledges the need for Heaven's help and fellowship with the Creator. Prayerlessness is the ultimate pride.True humility understands its need for the Father. Humility also has eyes to see the awesome work our God has accomplished in the lives of others. We humble ourselves by helping others "have their day in the Son" while loving them with the same love we have for ourselves. Somebody once said, "The grace of God humbles a man without degrading him and exalts a man without inflating him!"
Prayer:
Father, I am Gideon. I am the least in my family and my parents are the least in their family. I am the youngest, the only unemployed, the only unmarried, and I feel so discouraged about the state of my life. Father, what does it take for my life to turn around and for Your power and presence to fill my life? My life doesn't give You glory as I stay home most of the time and feel depressed most of the time. Where is the spirit of Joseph and Daniel and Moses who were world changers for Your kingdom in their time. Father, I want to be part of Your movement to bring about hope and healing in the world. Many times I feel like a spec of dust, insignificant and invisible. Remind me of my value and help me to become all that You intend.
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