heaven's tree book club

October 11, 2012
Preface
This is now my sixth day of fasting and I should have come to this text on fasting by Piper (1997) earlier, but I had not yet finished on the book on intercession. I love Piper's work but never had the chance to reflect on it. My feet are very cold and I feel weak and very hungry. I know I will quit this fast soon. In fact, fasting and prayer should go hand in hand. We as Christians do not fast merely for health reasons.. Today had been a difficult day but not nearly as bad as yesterday. Today was about disappointment and delay. The product I was looking for since I am running out of calcium was not in today and I need to wait one more day and such is the nature of delay and the need for patience. I mean the whole system of why we have both a Weste Sacramento as well as Sacramento branch is puzzling to me. Something goes through west Sac first. That is besides the point and God uses delay in our lives to show us something about spiritual growth. I am not any bit healed today, but somehow I continue to have faith. There was a powerful devotional this morning from Chambers this morning on silence. It said that God gives us silence because He trusts us and it is His greatest gift of intimacy. I guess we can make the human comparison as when we're with our wives and can simply sit together on a park bench and not need to say anything but can trust in that silence that there is a deep and intimate bond. I was deeply refreshed by the devotional on silence as well as being able to finally listen to Christian radio again because I finally asked my brother to hook up the clock radio next to the sofa where I sleep. I heard a powerful sermon on clinging on to favorite promises when we're going through tough times. 
"Beware of books on fasting. The Bible is very careful to warn us about people who "advocate abstaining from foods, which God created to be gratefully shared in by those who believe and know the truth" (1 Timothy 4:1-3). The apostle Paul asks with dismay, "Why... do you submit yourself to decrees, such as 'Do not handle, do not taste, do not touch'?" (Colossians 2:20-21). He is jealous for the full enjoyment of Christian liberty. Like a great declaration of freedom over every book on fasting flies the banner, "Food will not commend us to God; we are neither the worse if we do not eat, nor the better if we do eat" (1 Corinthians 8:8). There once were two men. One said, "I fast twice a week"; the other said, "God be merciful to me a sinner." Only one went down to his house justified (Luke 18:12-14)."
Piper opens his book on fasting with the word beware. The interesting thing here is that the tax collector did not even fast while the other man did. This is to say that by virtue of fasting we are not more righteous if our heart isn't right and in the case of this man, he thought he could earn his righteousness and standing before God with good works.


""Desires for other things"—there's the enemy. And the only weapon that will triumph is a deeper hunger for God. The weakness of our hunger for God is not because he is unsavory, but because we keep ourselves stuffed with "other things." Perhaps, then, the denial of our stomach's appetite for food might express, or even increase, our soul's appetite for God.
What is at stake here is not just the good of our souls, but also the glory of God. God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him. The fight of faith is a fight to feast on all that God is for us in Christ. What we hunger for most, we worship.
His goodness shines with brightest rays
When we delight in all his ways. His glory overflows its rim
When we are satisfied in him. His radiance will fill the earth
When people revel in his worth. The beauty of God's holy fire
Burns brightest in the heart's desire.
Between the dangers of self-denial and self-indulgence there is a path of pleasant pain. It is not the pathological pleasure of a masochist, but the passion of a lover's quest: "I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish in order that I may gain Christ" (Philippians 3:8). That is the path we will try to follow in this book."
We are stuffed with other things. I cling on to this piece. I ask myself, what am I stuffed with. What lesser things am I full on so that God is not what I hunger for. I confess that it is not one thing but a mix of different things. Sometimes in the Chinese church, we believe that serving God is the same as relationship with God. Many I have seen get involved in two, three, and sometimes four different ministries thinking they are doing God some kind of service. I do not minimize the idea of Christian service, but often, when service is not motivated by and saturated by a deep relationship with God then it is meaningless. Right now, I have yet to find my ministry place, and I have not found my place in the world. I hunger for career and ministry purpose and things to be involved in all the while God has given me this special time of joblessness to be close to Him and hunger for Him. I should grow closer to God while I have the opportunity. What we hunger for, we worship. Some hunger for power, or money, or fame. Can I say I hunger for God? I don't know. I have a difficult time seeing the beauty and awesomeness of God because this season has been marked by His silence.

"That I could even attempt the journey is owing to God's grace, which I live on every day. It has come to me in Jesus who loved me and gave himself for me. It has come to me in my wife, Noel, who supports me in the work of preaching and writing and tending the flock. I love you, Noel, and thank you for your partnership in the great work. God has been good to us. Grace has come to me again in the faithful labors of Carol Steinbach, whose careful reading has left its mark, and whose industry created the indexes. And grace has come to me through my fellow elders at Bethlehem Baptist Church. They forged a mission statement for our church that I embrace as the mission of my life. And they gave me the charge and the time to write this book and make it a part of that mission: "We exist to spread a passion for the supremacy of God in all things for the joy of all peoples." That is my prayer for this book. When God is the supreme hunger of our hearts, he will be supreme in everything."
Prayer:
Father, I am asked the question about what I hunger for. In the midst of a fasting season, right now, I hunger for food. I am reminded from Jesus that man does not live on bread alone, but by every Word from the mouth of God. Do I hunger for You or am I so satisfied on littler things? In my season of joblessness and health issues, I search for meaning and purpose. I have a hard time right now with my faith and thus seeing You as my deepest desire. Father, You seem so far and so silent in this season where I need You the most. As I continue this fast and beyond, I continue to seek Your face and pray for breakthrough in my life. Father, more than any other time, in my weakness, I need You.