PRAYING ACCORDING TO GOD'S WILL

Every couple of days I revisit an old post and find a comment. Yesterday’s post had one and the comment was “convicting”. The chapter on persistence in prayer has indeed been a convicting one for me and a solid reminder. Sittser’s quote that I included at the end of the post about Jacob really help to reinforce not giving up on God. Thanks for commenting.

This present chapter is on God’s will. God's will is often this phrase that is so common in Christian circles. Certainly, we desire to know and do God's will. Sometimes, when we know what it involves, we are not so certain. This chapter goes into God's will, dividing God's will into His revealed will and His hidden will. This will be explored later, but it is helpful to pause and take a step back. This is now the fifth chapter. We are not introduced to any new concepts to prayer. The glaring take away in these first few chapters is don't give up and that prayer is an epic journey and it is about the relationship. Powerful stories have been shared along the way including those from Sittser's own life that involve the sudden death of his wife, child, and mother. I have been encouraged to persist and wrestle with God even when it seems like the situation is not improving. Sittser opens the chapter with this quote. 

We have to pray with our eyes on God, not on the difficulties.

Oswald Chambers

Our eyes must be on God in our prayer. It must not be on our difficulties. Great idea, really hard to put into practice. At present, it is Friday evening. I just had my follow-up visit to the doctor's for an X-ray on my knee. The result showed no bone damage. That was the good news. The bad news is that the doctor does not know what is causing the joint pain. I have been referred now to a Rheumatologist. The whole thing now seems incredibly frightening to me. It is like a nightmare I never thought would happen. Throughout my college years never could I imagine that I would have a chronic joint disability at age 31. All the while, I feel like I am going through this all alone. It is hard to take my eye off of the problem and back on to God. The popular line of reasoning creeps into my mind. If God is good, then this situation would never have happened. Either God is not good or God is not sovereign. This is by far the hardest time so far in my life. The pain medication I was prescribed today does not provide relief from the physical pain. The physical pain drives me into a deeper spiritual crisis. 

Sittser begins with the assumption that prayer is powerful and can change and influence the future. He lists many of the bold claims of Scripture:

"I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.''1

 "If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, arid it will be done for you."2

"Very truly I tell you, my Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete."3

The common catch to all this is that we are praying in the name of Jesus. Sittser discusses this condition.

"But there's a condition attached to the promise, and most of us know what it is, intuitively if not consciously. We know we can't ask God for just anything. We must make reasonable requests. In short, we must pray according to God's will. If prayer were a blank check, we would need two signatures to cash it in. One would be our signature; the other would be God's signature. God himself must sign off on our requests. He must give final approval.

This sounds simple enough. But what exactly does it mean to pray "according to God's will"? On one level it seems obvious. Giving it even a moment's thought, I wouldn't have much trouble making a long list of requests that would be worthy of God's attention. At least I wouldn't have to think twice before answering them if I were God! Which sounds glib; I know. Yet who hasn't entertained the same thought when asking God for something that seems right, good, and true? How could God not will the conversion of a troubled neighbor, the deliverance of an addicted friend, or the restoration of a broken relationship? It seems like a no-brainer to me." (p. 103)

I ask myself, how often does the check have my name and not God's name on the prayer check. I think many prayers are like that. Often times I think genuinely we ask for things we think are in line with God's will. The restoration of a marriage, the salvation of a relative, and the healing of a physical condition all appear to be things God would desire and would sign off on.

Great men and women of faith have wrestled with praying according to God's will. Luther in his old age witnessed his beloved daughter face terminal illness. He prayed earnestly that God would heal her.

"When his daughter drew near to death, he fell on his knees before her bed and, weeping bitterly, prayed that God might save her, if it be his will. A little while later, she died in his arms." (p. 105)

I don't know what that would be like. I am not a father and I do not have any children who are close to me. I can imagine however the grief and anguish at witnessing the slow death of a beloved daughter. Such things just do not appear fair. It appears harsh. It would seem like God's will is that Luther's daughter would recover.

Sittser goes into discussing that God has a revealed will. It can be found in God's word.

 

"God's Word has that same kind of clarity. John Calvin believed that for us to pray with power, we must first understand who God is and what God has planned. We must therefore study Scripture and so come to know the heart of God. Only then will we be able to pray according to God's will. Otherwise, we pray out of ignorance. "It remains for us to seek in him and in prayers to ask of him, what we have learned to be in him.''7 God has not left us in the dark. He has communicated what we need to know.

Still, I wonder if it is that easy. If there's a problem, I'm not sure that it is lack of knowledge, not entirely anyway. It could be lack of courage and conviction. Do we really want to know God's will? This question makes me squirm. I probably know enough already. I know, but I don't necessary believe or do. I want life to be nice, safe, and secure. But, as C. S. Lewis put it, God does not want to make life nice for us, because he wants to make us new. That is his will. When we pray, we should keep that end in mind.8 It is enough to make me think twice about praying at all. After all, God's will concerns the coming of his kingdom, the doing of his will as he commands it in Scripture. That strikes me as exciting, but also slightly menacing." (p. 106)

Nice, safe, and secure. I think that too is how we want life to be. If we take a look at Scripture and the lives of the men and women of faith we see that life for them and life as it is meant for us is not nice, safe, and secure. So, then, God's will is dangerous, it is unpredictable, and to some of us, it is terrifying. I think that is where I find myself right now. Maybe that is why I am so hesitant to ask for God's will to be done.

God's will involves suffering. It is seen in the life of Christ and the life of Paul and so many others. Yet, for the Christian we wrestle with whether or not God delights in our pain like some sadistic satanic being. Can that really be God's nature? Sittser ponders this because of what happened to his child, wife, and mother.

"For a long time I could not imagine that the accident was or could be the will of God, on any level. The very idea was utterly repulsive to me. In one sense that is still true. I do not believe that God "caused" the accident, as if he made a random choice to extinguish the lives of three members of my family. But there might be more to the idea of "cause" than a random, heartless, purposeless divine act. God did not "cause" the accident; but he did "cause" the good that came from it. In that sense he has been in it from beginning to end. It was clearly part of the epic journey of our lives.

I have experienced the fruits of it, too. The accident itself has proved to be powerfully redemptive, which accords with how God works in the world. I have seen what God has accomplished in me, in my children, and in many others. Though the suffering was bad, the effect has been good. Though the accident contradicted God's good design for our lives (mothers and children are not supposed to be snatched from the home in that way!), it nevertheless has served to accomplish God's will, too, largely in the way God has used it to transform us--and not only us but thousands of other people as well. I know for certain that God has used the accident to change my life. I am far more patient now, especially at home. I am far more flexible with my time, generous with my resources, and calm when facing turbulence.

In short, suffering has done me good, though I would have never chosen it. Not then, and probably not even now" (p. 108).

So there are two opposing sides. There is God and there is the enemy of our souls who seeks to destroy. He is the one who causes the destruction and yet equally at work is God who causes the good to come out of destruction. God did not cause the accident. The growth and the redemption that came out of it is His work and His will. I think of the story of Joseph. How he was beaten, betrayed, and sold into slavery by his own blood brothers is tragic. How he was framed by Podifer's wife for rape was injustice. Yet out of injustice and tragedy, God was at work for the salvation of many when he became prime minister of Egypt and organized the nations food supply during the years of excess and the years of famine. What others meant for evil, God turned into His good.

A wonderful example of this conflict in praying for God's will is Jesus in the garden.

"Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me."

We hear in this prayer the knowledge and agony Jesus has in facing the cross and all that He knows that it will involve. Yet moments later He says:

"Yet not my will, but yours be done.''

This is the agony and the resolution in the same prayer in regards to a tremendously difficult situation. Jesus surrender His will to the will of the Father.

"When Jesus left the garden, he was ready for the horror that awaited him. He had surrendered his will to his Father's. In effect, he had said, "Here I am. Make me what you will. Do with me as you will. Put me to whatever test or task you will. I am yours."

This is a tension we must live in, and one that is impossible to resolve. On the one hand, we pray for what we believe to be God's will, and we do so boldly and persistently. On the other hand, we pray with humility and in submission, ready to surrender to what in fact happens that might seem, at least at the time, to run contrary to God's will. Jesus did not hesitate to pray for what he wanted, and neither should we. But in the end he surrendered to what he realized God wanted. Gethsemane. Like Jesus, we might discover God's will in the act of prayer; we might also discover his will through the natural of order of events. In either case, we must live in that tension--pray for what we believe is right, submit to what in fact happens, no matter what it is. Our submission to God is, after all, a dimension of God's will for us." (pp. 109-110).

That last part is key. Our submission to God is after all, part of God's will. Humility is something that isn't natural and happens through God's maturing work in us. To let go of our will and submit to God's will is very difficult especially if it involves a fraction of what Jesus went through.

Sittser says to know how to pray God's will we can look at the prayers of Scripture. He states that we do not find prayers for long life, good health, and success in our secular sense. Sadly, these are some of the prayers we sometimes hear in Chinese churches. Not that it is wrong to pray for these things, but they must not be the focal point. Sittser draws our attention to the prayer of Paul in Ephesians for the church:

I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord's people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may b, filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Paul prays that the church would know the depths of God's love and that they would grow and mature. It sounds like a very poetic and God-centered prayer and it is. Yet, if we consider the goal, we know that the journey to know how deep God's love is, we know that the journey is a very challenging one.

Sittser then turns to the incarnation of Jesus. This is a powerful moment in time that is a mystery to us. God became a human being. The sovereign and transcendent God became a helpless child.

"Perhaps God's condescension provides a model for how we should pray. As God became lowly, weak, and vulnerable in Jesus, so we demonstrate those same qualities in prayer. Prayer calls on God to accomplish some good and godly purpose. Yet prayer also requires us to be humble, recognizing our neediness and helplessness. If anything, prayer is an act of submission to God. When we pray, we are like animals that roll over on their backs, exposing their underside. We are like Jesus hanging naked on the cross. We may be warriors, but warriors who have no weapon to fight with but prayer itself." (pp. 117-118).

Prayer makes us utterly vulnerable before our God and King. We come to Him in utter weakness and humility just as the incarnation of Jesus demonstrates humility and weakness.

Sittser concludes with the Lord's prayer and how it is a model for us:

Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done,

on earth as it is in heaven.

Give us today our daily bread.

And forgive us our debts,

as we also have forgiven our debtors.

And lead us not into temptation,

but deliver us from the evil one,

for yours is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory forever.

Amen.23

The first thing is the priority, God is our Father and He is to be set apart. That is who we are praying to, the infinite God of the universe. We show Him reverence and respect. The second thing is that it calls for God's kingdom to be established here on earth. God's kingdom is one of justice and mercy. Third, we ask God for our basic needs. Fourth, we acknowledge our vulnerability as we pray for deliverance from the evil. Lastly, and I think most powerfully, we remind ourselves that God is in control, for His is the power, the kingdom and the glory forever.

So, there is this tension between God's total sovereignty and our finite praying.

"It is in that tension that we find the motivation for prayer. We pray because we know that God is in complete control; he is moving history forward so that, in the end, his divine plan will be perfectly accomplished. But we also pray because God will use our prayers to accomplish that plan. God is the writer, the grand and glorious storyteller; we are the characters. We are real characters, too, not mere fabrications of God's imagination The role we play contributes to the unfolding of the plot; the prayers we say influence the mind of the author.

This is how God has set things up. This is why he commands us to pray. It is the wonderful burden we must bear. In a flourish of brilliance, P. T. Forsyth concludes:

Asking is a polar cooperation .... We do not ask as beggars but as children. Petition is not mere receptivity, nor is it mere pressure; it is filial reciprocity. Love loves to be told what it knows already. Every lover knows that. It wants to be asked for what it longs to give." (p. 119)

Prayer:

Father, this has been a marvelous exploration on prayer. We have journey through the tension of praying for Your will to be done when it is so agonizing for us. Our focus in and through must be You and not our present difficulty. The prayer Jesus taught us is so simple and yet so powerful. We acknowledge Your sovereign reign and provision. We ask on behalf of ourselves and our community for our basic physical and spiritual needs. We acknowledge our total dependence on You and come to You in utter humility as the incarnation demonstrates. Yet, in this final thought, we see Your heart, the heart of a Beloved. You desire to bless and provide for the joy of Your people as a Father rejoices over his children. May I see Your Father heart in these moments of struggle and difficulty. My joint situation right now does not look good. My job situation does not look good. Everything seems totally bleak and I feel like I am going through these moments alone. Nevertheless, in this prayer journey, I ask that I would know Your love, Your heart, and Your will.

THE COURAGE TO KEEP ASKING

This concept of persistence is a real hard one for me. So, I had my interview today. This was the first time I showed up with both a white cane and a walker. I am both blind and cripple. The interview itself was very hard and long. I left with this feeling of discouragement because I know I did not interview well. Also, walking into the office was a real challenge because there were stairs. Each step was so painful and I walked into the office already drained even before the interview. Recently, I just feel really tired. My job situation and my health situation remain so uncertain. I need the courage to persist with God. 

 He who knows how to overcome with God in prayer has heaven and earth at his disposal

C. H. Spurgeon

This is the quote for this chapter. I am not quite sure what he means by overcome with God. It does have the idea of not giving up with God. There are these setbacks and these moments of difficulty and these are the hardest moments to overcome.

Sittser (2007) opens with an illustration from his own life. He was in seminary. He was 24 and his wife 25. Linda wanted children and ached to be a mother. She did not conceive until 34. They received many suggestions, some helpful and others hurtful. But, Linda at times would give up in praying. Sometimes, she felt like God was uncaring and distant. There are these times when we pray everyday and then become inconsistent thinking God is so distant and uncaring, so for a time we stop. I've been through some of these moments. Since I can remember early on in college, I've prayed for a wife. It has been nearly 13 years and so many times I have given up asking, thinking God has no interest in my love life. Then, there are periods when my faith and believe in God's goodness and provision are strong.

Sittser then addresses this idea of when to quit praying. He proposes that sometimes it is obvious like praying for a child's life to be spared like King David and then the child died. It is clear then the child will not return to health. Other times it is not so certain. Referring to Linda's pregnancy, Sittser:

"We were tempted to quit on more than one occasion. But we carried on, day after day, year after year, never failing to ask God for our heart's desire. It became almost monotonous and rote, at least to me, as if I was a phone solicitor, mouthing the same words a hundred or a thousand times a day. We persisted because we had no reason not to, other than the frustration of feeling that heaven's doors had been slammed shut. I wondered at times whether we were annoying God, subjecting him to the spiritual equivalent of Chinese water torture. The great masters of prayer have always been clear on this point: We should persist in prayer unless and until we have a good reason not to." (p. 79-80)

I wonder too whether or not I am annoying God with some of my prayers. These past few weeks I have prayed for healing for my joints and some days it feels like I said the same thing yesterday and yet the pain and discomfort in my joints lead me to continue asking for healing. I have no reason at this point to stop asking. He then follows by saying the failure of prayer is to stop praying.

Following are some historical voices that have a point worth pondering:

"The leaders of the fourteenth-century renewal movement called Devotio Maderna taught that persistence in prayer would build confidence that God really does care for us. "We ought to be vigorous in prayer and not easily brought to a halt. Nor should we imagine that God does not want to hear us; rather, even when we feel put off, we should not despair."" (p. 80).

Even when we feel put off, we should not despair. How often is it that when I feel put off, that is exactly when I stop. Persistence in prayer actually build confidences that God does care for us.

Sittser then talks about the Eastern Orthodox tradition who has given us the Jesus prayer. It gives us a method for persistence in prayer.

"Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner."

This prayer addresses the most basic concerns of prayer. Jesus is identified as God's Son. We acknowledge that we are sinners. And thirdly, it asks God for mercy.

The next section is hopeful results. The results of those who have prayed continuously also provide hope. Sittser speaks of a friend who has prayed and fasted consistently for ten years for a neighbor to come to faith. It was in that tenth year when the neighbor began going to church and gave his life to Christ. Ten years of prayer and fasting for a neighbor to come to faith.

Many people pray for many years with the same unresolved issues.

"In the face of such disappointment, some people give up--sometimes on prayer, sometimes even on God. They simply quit. They stop believing, hoping, and enduring. Unanswered prayer drives them away from God. But other people weather the storm of unanswered prayer and actually emerge from it stronger than before, like a tree overhanging a tempestuous ocean and strengthened by its exposure to harsh weather. These men and women become masters of the spiritual life and seasoned practitioners of prayer.

Surprisingly, the people I know who are the most faithful and fruitful masters of prayer are the ones who faced the most devastating experiences of unanswered prayer and yet somehow endured. Their disappointments and failures pushed them deeper into the spiritual life. They learned how to pray with greater power because their prayers seemed at one time to be powerless. What happened to them? What kept them going?" (p. 82)

Failures in our lives is what should turn us toward God with continued and renewed faith. I think I am in the category of believers who often does not immerge from unanswered prayer stronger. I often give up.

Sittser talks about how our culture does not help. We are a culture of instant results and instant gratification. Prayer does not operate that way. Prayer is a journey. It is an epic journey with triumphs and disappointments.

This concept of persistence in prayer is Biblical. Jesus provides a parable in Luke 18 about a persistent widow who asks a judge for justice. Because of her persistence, the judge grants her the request. This idea is supported by the comment that ends the parable:

And will not God bring about justice for his Chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off?. I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly."

God cares about our concerns. I think the frequency and persistence by which we come to God demonstrates our seriousness in our asking.

So why be persistent in prayer? Is God trying to reinforce some kind of nagging spirituality? Sittser suggests otherwise.

Still, there may be good reason for persistence in prayer. It can affect us in positive ways. First, persistence drives us to God, again and again, thus reinforcing the relationship. The point of prayer, after all, is the relationship itself, not the things we get from the relationship. Whatever the reasons for unanswered prayer, surely our relationship with God should be bigger than whether or not God chooses to answer our prayers!" (p. 87).

Prayer drives us to God, this is a given. We turn to no one else because no one else can help in these difficult situations that we are praying about. It is the relationship that is central. It is not so much if we get what we ask for but that God is who we turn to and who comes through and is present,.

There is still another reason:

"Persistence also purges and purifies us. Unanswered prayer might force us to change how we pray, though we keep praying all the same. Far from giving up, our prayers will move us ever closer to the heart of what God wants for us.

Some people persist for years in praying to God for the same thing--the conversion of a parent, the growth of a church, the healing of strife within a family. In the end their prayers get results; they get what they asked for.

 Other people persist for years in praying for something that never happens. Instead of giving up, they change how they are praying. They begin to pray that God will help them to love a child who does not return to the faith, to forgive a spouse who does not want reconciliation, to remain faithful to a church that keeps declining. In other words, they continue on the epic journey, adjusting to the changing landscape and adapting to new circumstances. They don't stop because the landscape is not to their liking or the plot isn't turning out as they expected. They change their expectations and continue the journey, always keeping in mind the ultimate goal--the coming of God's kingdom, the doing of God's will." (p. 90-91)

This reason is powerful. Prayer, persistent prayer is important because it changes us and grows us in our faith. We may not get what we ask for, but we continue in prayer and God changes us. It purifies us and matures us. Sittser makes mention of Paul's thorn in the flesh.. Paul prayed three times for its removal but God did not take it away. Rather, Paul learned that God's grace is sufficient and His power is made perfect in Paul's weakness.

Sittser then shares about a beloved colleague at the college. This professor once shared from Paul's experience about his own thorn in the flesh. He had a medical condition that did not become healed.

"Though Howard never stopped praying, he did over time begin to pray differently. Rather than pray that his weakness be overcome, he concentrated on God's goodness strength, which was made perfect in his weakness. He became deeply aware of God's provision in his life. "On the days medicine is not working, the Lord has to give me grace. In those times, Christ has been there for me."

Howard recognized the gifts that God had given to him his faithful and loving wife of thirty-eight years, financial stability, a job he loved, and many loyal friends. But How was a gift to us, too. He became the champion of the coll mission, a source of encouragement to all, especially to faculty, and an example of God's love for the campus." (p. 92)

What a shift in attitude and thought. We become more aware of God and His power and provision in our weakness. Prayer is a journey and it drives us into the heart of God where we find Him to be sufficient and to meet our deepest needs. We do not always get what we want, but in praying God gives us something better.

Sittser concludes with the story of Jacob and his transformation:

"Then he gave Jacob a new name, "Israel.': a peculiar name, and not particularly complimentary. The name reflects a quality of character that God values. It means, "one who strives with God." Jacob was a so that became his name--and not only his name, but the name of God's chosen people, for all time.

That is what God looks for in us. He wants us to strive with him, as he does with us. To wrestle with him as if life depended on it, because it probably does. To persist in prayer, no matter how much the odds are stacked against To refuse to take "no" for an answer from God, just as, has refused to take "no" for an answer from us, no how long and hard we have resisted him. It is the least we do, what God has done for us, what love requires and demands.

Persistence is a good way to respond to unanswered prayer. In effect, it is saying, "God, you may choose not to answer my prayers. But I'm going to keep praying all the same, even if you get sick of it." (pp. 98-99).

Prayer:

Father, I come to You tonight being more convinced than ever that You delight in having a relationship with Your people. Not just a shallow relationship, but rather a deep and close relationship. The Bible shows that constant pursuing of Your people and ultimately when You came to Your people for the redemption of many. God, You so care for us and delight in having a relationship. Often times, we give up so quickly in asking for real and serious needs and think You don't care but in these times may we have the faith and the devotion to come nearer even still. In the process, Father change us, grow us. As You did with Paul and his thorn in the flesh, teach us in the journey of prayer. Right now, I have my own thorn, and it is the pain in my joints. I pray continuously for healing but do not know yet what is the problem or what it means. Father, please give me the wisdom and strength to know and accept Your will in this. Today's job interview did not go so well and I don't know if I ever will find employment. So Father, I pray for my future and ask that You provide in ways I never thought were possible.

CAN GOD TAKE OUR COMPLAINTS?

It is now day three and chapter three of this text. This title is quite relevant for me right now. I have so much pessimism and negativity stored inside. Last night I received an e-mail from a job interview I had nearly six weeks ago. It took six weeks for me to find out from them. I wish I could be unphased by rejection letters, but I am human. And, certainly this rejection letter effects my confidence for tomorrow's interview. I found out who will interview me and it will be two people. This is the first time being interviewed by two people. They both hold management positions and one is the program director. Having found out, I feel very intimidated. I woke up this morning and it appeared as though the joint discomfort had decreased only for it to increase later on in the morning. I still don't know how I am going to make it tomorrow. Everything, right now, seems so bleak.

The quote for this chapter is:

The best prayers often have more groans than words.

John Bunyan

I think this is true. Sometimes, when the trial is so challenging that we don't even know what to say to God anymore. We run out of words. We make noises that are not even words and do not even make sense. Prayer then like we explored last time is a cry of desperation.

Sittser (2007) opens with an illustration of a man whose daughter has a terminal illness. He prays for her healing. Suddenly, there is a glimpse of hope, only for a moment, and things turn tragic for his daughter. Recorded are his reactions:

"It is all too much for him. He makes his way back to the church. He finds the cake he accidentally left there, which he was going to give to Carol and the hospital staff to celebrate her remission. Leaving the church, he notices a crucifix hanging over the central doorway of the church. In his grief and rage he takes the cake, balances it perfectly in his hand, and flings it at the crucifix. His aim is perfect. The cake hits Jesus square in the face. Then Wanderhope sinks down to the steps, unable to move. He is utterly spent, having fought so hard, prayed so helplessly, hoped so foolishly for an answer to prayer that never came.

I have never hurled a cake at Jesus, as the fictional character Wanderhope does in Peter De Vries's wrenching novel The Blaod of the Lamb. But I have wanted to because I have felt that same kind of emotion, that same kind of pain, that same kind of rage. Like Wanderhope, I have felt betrayed by God. Perhaps you have, too. In my experience most Christians feel this way at some point in their journeys. They have been bitterly angry at God. Is it wrong to feel this kind of emotion? Is it wrong to vent such emotion to God?" (p. 59).

I believe too, that I have felt that same disappointment, that same frustration. I too have never thrown a cake at Jesus, but I wonder if I was in the same situation, would I do the same. Many of us have never been in that same level or that same situation. Most of us have not seen an illness take over the body of a loved one. We wonder in these moments, where is God in the grief and pain?

Emotions are real. The issue becomes what do we do with them? Sittser's thoughts are that we can suppress them. This does not work because eventually it will come out and not in a constructive form. Others will lash out at innocent people which often ends up being family members. This too is not healthy. Another way is to turn our emotions inward which is often anger or depression. This too is not healthy. The Bible states an alternative.

The Bible actually offers a different solution. It tell to direct our pain toward God. ... The Psalms show us how to express our emotions not only positive ones, like gladness and gratitude, but negative ones, like anger and despair." (p. 62). Indeed, David and other psalmists demonstrate real emotions. Many times it is joy and celebration. Other times, anger, disappointment, and desperation. It shows that we are taking God seriously and communicating with Him.

"The Psalms put negative emotions into words. Half the Psalms contain complaints, usually directed toward God. The psalmist does not hesitate to wrestle with God, cry out to God, weep before God, even blame God for misery and suffering. However high their view of God, the Hebrews believed that God was great and gracious enough to absorb this raw and reckless emotion and strong enough to withstand the hostility we pour on him. The Psalms show us that, when we approach God, we must speak the truth--about ourselves, about our circumstances, especially about our feelings. God doesn't seem to take offense. If anything, he invites such express He wants us to turn our emotion into a prayer, however n it might be. Listen to these cries:" (p. 63-64)

LORD, how many are my foes!

How many rise up against me!

Many are saying of me,

"God will not deliver him. "#

I am worn outfkom groaning.

All night long I flood my bed with weeping

and drench my couch with tears.

My eyes grow weak with sorrow.5

Why, LORD, do you stand far off.

Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?6

How long, LORD God Almighty, will your anger smolder against the prayers of your people?

You have fed them with the bread of tears;

you have made them drink tears by the bowlful,z

God is able to take our emotions. He is able to love us still even in our frustrations and groaning. God is a good parent who continues on loving us even when our love is less than perfect towards Him.

Sittser recommends memorizing some Psalms and praying it back to God substituting for the situation. Using Psalm 6:6-7 he prayed:

"I am weary of complaining;

every night 1 cry to you, God;

I drench my pillow with the tears of anguish and pain

until I can cry no longer.

My eyes are bitter with brine;

they grow weak because of my troubles.

I am exhausted by my sorrow.

Even when I have stopped crying,

my heart still aches and groans.

Will this ever end?" (pp. 65-66)

Sittser states that prayer does at least one thing. It pushes us toward God. Then, he brings this into an analogy to marriage. It is far better to communicate than to leave issues unspoken. It is better to voice frustration and disappointment than to leave these things left unsaid. So it is in our relationship with God. We must be honest with Him.

Jesus is our model. Jesus came to His Father with true agony the night before His unlawful arrest. We can see this in the event in Gethsemane. This was perhaps the most deepest display of agony Jesus showed in prayer before the cross.

While on the cross, Jesus uttered those words from Psalm 22:

My       God, my God, why have you forsaken me?

Why are you so far from saving me, so far from the words of my groaning?

My       God, 1 cry out by day, but you do not answer;

by night, but I find no rest....

Other Psalms express a range of emotions. Some Psalms charge God for wrong doing. It would seem like the writer was an atheist. We see real emotions in this heart-felt communication and cries to God.

"Such resolution is never more startling and moving than the testimony of the writer of Psalm 22, the very psalm Jesus had on his lips as he was dying on the cross. This psalm expresses both despair and hope, anger and faith. The cry of pain ends with a confession of confidence; agony leads to resolution. If there is no struggle, there can be no peace. The psalmist won't have one without the other.

He begins with an accusation. "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" He rails against God for the pain and anguish he feels, like a child who finally gets a chance to strike out against an abusive parent. He feels utterly abandoned. The pain is too much for him to bear.

Yet in the end he confesses his faith in the same God he accuses, he prays for deliverance to the same God who has made his life so miserable. However angry, he recognizes that apart from God there is no help and no hope. (p. 75)

But you, LORD, do not be far from me.

You are my strength; come quickly to help me.

Deliver me from the sword,

my precious life om the power of the dogs.

Rescue me from the mouth of the lions;

save me om the horns of the wild oxen.

If there is no struggle, then there can be no peace. Agony leads to resolution. We gain confidence in God in and through our cries of desperation. We begin with the complaint but then it turns to hope. So it is with the structure of the prayers in the Bible. We still believe that God will come through that God will rescue. Yes, God is still in control.

The Psalmist declares:

I will declare your name to my people;

in the assembly I will praise you.

You who fear the LORD, praise him!

All you descendants of ]acob, honor him! Revere him,

all you descendants of Israel!...

All the ends of the earth

will remember and turn to the LORD,

and all the families of the nations

will bow down before him,

for dominion belongs to the LORD

and he rules over the nations.

"The Psalms keep us grounded in God. Every home needs a grounding wire to keep it safe during an electrical storm. However 'powerful the strike of lightning, it will inflict no damage if a home has such a wire, for that wire will send the 'electrical charge directly into the ground, where it can do no damage. The Psalms are like grounding wire for emotional lightning bolts.

The Psalms invite us to complain, to plot revenge, to accuse God, all in the form amazing as this sounds of a prayer. The Psalms assume that God is big enough, powerful enough, and gracious enough to absorb that emotion so that it causes no destruction. Ironically, the frustration that unanswered prayer engenders is itself turned into a prayer. Rather than cutting us off from God, unanswered prayer drives us to God. These prayers might sound as bitter as poison, but they are still prayers. It seems as if any kind of prayer, even those that are mean and angry, is better than no prayer at all. However irreverent, these prayers are .still prayers." (p. 76-77)

Prayer:

Father, I can remember times in my life when I have felt so disappointed at You that I neglected to pray completely. Here in this chapter we are reminded that complaining prayer is better than no prayer. Prayer drives us to You and declares our need for You as our help and our hope. In the Psalms we find raw emotions of anger, frustration, disappointment, and discouragement as well as joy and celebration. We wrestle with doubts and disappointments. Father, I wrestle with my physical health situation and pain in my joints. I don't even know if I can make it to the interview tomorrow. I continue to cry out for help and healing in my situation. I continue to trust that You are in control of every situation and commit these issues into Your care.

True Heart of Prayer

Before I enter into some reflection about chapter two, I'm thinking about the previous chapter. It was filled with many examples of believers who prayed fervently while in distress and yet God seemed silent. Sittser provided some wrongful responses why prayer is not answered such as we did not have enough faith and we did not use the right words. The key I took away at the end was to persist. I was reading Revelations 21 the other day and verse eight lists all these different categories of people who have a place in hell that include unbelieving and liars. One of the categories were the cowardly. That stands out to me but it makes so much sense. The Christian must be brave, and many times in Scripture God calls someone and says for them to be strong and courageous. He knows that we struggle with this one, but the desire is there for us to be strong and courageous. In the presence of difficult, we must press on.

The second chapter is titled: THE TRUE HEART OF PRAYER. Sittser once again provides a quote to start with:

We may pray most when we say least,

and we may pray least when we say most.

St. Augustine of Hippo

Some very confusing words upon first read. I think the idea here is simple. Prayer is not about the number of words we say. Some people can pray very lengthy prayers and seem to go on and on and not have very much content. Some say few words but genuinely mean what they say. So, it is not about the quantity of words.

Sittser returns to this idea of the epic using the example of the Lord of the Rings. He tells of the difficult journey along the way though in the end our main characters are triumphant. So it is with us in our present life here on earth. Each day has its high points and lows. There are some really joyous moments and there are moments of extreme difficult. I am reminded here in this opening paragraph to keep the big picture in mind.

Sittser calls unanswered prayer the essential part of the plot line. "When all other courses of action have been eliminated, when we stand at the edge of the abyss, when we approach God with empty hands and an aching heart, then we draw close to the true heart of prayer." (Sittser, 2007 p. 44). He does not quite say what this true heart of prayer is, but the description is clear. We come to God in desperation when we have exhausted all other solutions. It is like the woman who had internal bleeding for twelve years and the doctors had no help for her but she exhausted all her financial resources but then had the faith to touch Jesus and thus receive healing for her body. We come to realize where hope is found and who is really in control of all things.

Sittser goes on to describe a man named Kevin he meets at a church ministry for the homeless. In it he finds a powerful reminder:

"Suddenly everything had changed. I was no longer heroic outsider who visits The City Gate once a week to the "less fortunate," as we like to call them. I was standing the presence of a saint who knew that without Jesus he would probably be dead. . . .

 I forget all too quickly how much I need Jesus, how we all need Jesus. When I'm at The City Gate, I see greater clarity what I know to be true in my head but always in my heart--why Jesus came, whom Jesus spent with, how much Jesus loved the needy." (p. 46)

Too often, in the "middle-class" church, we have "safe" gatherings with people who seem to have it together. Whenever we hear baptism testimonies from our youth group kids, we hear stories of very "normal" and "innocent" upbringings. It seems like when we do street ministry, we hear stories of people with very disturbing pasts of abuse, violence, and near-death experiences. All of us, whatever upbringing, whatever class, all need Jesus. It comes down to whether or not we sense our need for Jesus.

Sittser talks about how we love the gifts God gives us but we ignore the giver. That is sad that we often forget who gives us what we have. I often think of the parent-child relationship. It is like buying my child a car and he spends his evenings with his friends and rarely ever spends time at home. The Father heart of God desires relationship. Sittser says that he finds himself pray the most when in deep need. It should be that whether in deep need or not in deep need that we should come to God. We come now to the true heart of prayer:

"The heart of true prayer is this cry of desperation. It is the cry of those who, committed to seeing God's kingdom come and God's will be done on earth as it is in heaven, find themselves in circumstances that show little evidence that there even is a kingdom of God. There is a time and place in the Christian faith to master the techniques of prayer, to develop the discipline of prayer, and to become comfortable and confident when we pray. But what is most fundamental is the spirit of our prayers, the cry of the heart to get help from the only one who can meet our deepest need. Desperation is the first and primary condition for true prayer." (p. 47-48).

I agree with Sittser that desperation is where we begin with in our praying. I don't think most have this sense of desperation until something incredibly difficult comes. Our normal tone is flat. We lack urgency and desperation both in our praying and in our Christian life. I was just pondering this fact. I am not sure what our population is, and counting the entire county, perhaps we have over a million. Consider the amount of seating we have in our local churches. If every church was full, would we have enough space to hold everyone in our county if they were to attend. In one week we have a city-wide evangelistic event and many of us pray for revival to come to this region. Is the church ready for revival?

 

In Sittser's section titled learned desperation he writes this:  "I might pray complacently about many things, but not about my children, at least not any more. I am so aware of my inadequacy as a father and of the long-term con

sequences of the trauma my children experienced that I find myself crying out to God as if God were my only hope, my last resort, my one chance to see that good triumphs over evil. I know how impermanent things are, how fragile relationships are, how little control I have.

Every time I watch my kids drive off in one of our cars, I tremble because I realize that I might never see them again, at least not in this life. As they grow up and prepare to leave the home, I worry because I know that they will face adversity, hardship, and temptation from which I cannot protect them. So I pray for them out of desperation. As a single father I know how much I need God." (p. 51).

We know how much we need God. In situations when we are helpless and God is our only true help, we have this sense of urgency and desperation. It is a matter of perspective. Right now, I have a health situation with my joints. A year ago I did not. I could walk, run, climb, jump and without thinking twice. Right now, I dare not jump, I cannot go upstairs, and I can barely walk much less run. When we are place in situations where we need God, we no longer take the simple things for granted and we pray with desperation. Most of us in our 20s and 30s are in good health and financial stability especially those with degrees in the sciences. It would appear harder for people in stable and healthy lifestyles to really pray with desperation. I love the statement Sittser says next:

"My need for God is as great as my need for air, water, and food. Without God, I am dead." (p. 52)

What a realization. My need for God is like our need for food and water. He alone sustains us. Moment by moment, we need God.

Desperation, as Sittser writes leaves us vulnerable and sets us up for disappointment. Yet, it is in desperation where we find God. Pastor Gordon MacDonald tells of his experience at ground zero after September 11th.

 He provided spiritual support to those in the area. The sounds and smell of death were everywhere. To the observer, God would seem so far removed from this place of devastation and ruin. Yet, recorded is his experience:

"Yet MacDonald experienced God's presence. "I decided that God is closer to this place than any other place I've ever visited .... No church service; no church sanctuary; no religiously inspiring service has spoken so deeply into my soul and witnessed to the presence of God as those hours last night at the crash site."

But it was not just the presence of God he experienced in that setting, as devastating as it was. He also experienced vitality, power, a renewal of faith. "In all my years of Christian ministry, I never felt more alive than I felt last night ....

As much as I love preaching the Bible and all the other things that I have been privileged to do over the years, being on that street, giving cold water to workmen, praying and weeping with them, listening to their stories was the closest I have ever felt to God. Even though it sounds melodramatic, I kept finding myself saying, 'this is the place where Jesus most wants to be." (p. 55).

It would seem like a place of draining and not vitality, death instead of life. Yet, in this place, God became more real to Pastor MacDonald than any worship service he had been to. God indeed is in the midst of pain and poverty. He is present with those who grieve and face loss. God is present when we least expect it.

Sittser makes mention of Jesus on the cross. Jesus cries out to God who has forsaken Him in that moment when Christ takes on the sins of the world. Indeed, His Father has forsaken Him, but only for that moment, and for a eternal purpose. So it is with our struggles. Sittser says they are a hard and painful part of the journey. Yet more profound he states that they are not the entire journey.

"Unanswered prayer breaks us, deepens us, exposes us, and transforms us. The epic journey of prayer will lead to answers, but not before we face difficulties and disappointments along the way. Perhaps you have experienced

some of the very trials that             Unanswered prayer breaks" (p. 57)

Prayer:

Father, what devastating words uttered on the cross, "my God, my God, why have You forsaken me!" Those words uttered by Jesus and these words we often utter ourselves in our most painful moments are the cries of Your children. We come to You in desperation. My physical condition has not improved. I have pain in my ankles. I don't know what is wrong with my body and neither do medical professionals. My heart cries out for meaning, comfort, and healing. Moment by moment I know my need for You in my pain. Indeed, these struggles break us, and exposes me. There is a higher purpose and I pray that You will transform me through my discomfort. This chapter has reminded me of my desperation and need for You at all times including these present and difficult moments. Remind me Father that You are near to those facing difficulty.

  The greatest tragedy of life is not unanswered prayer, but unoffered prayer.

This is what Sittser (2007) opens with in his prolog to his text on unanswered prayer. I have decided to take a break for now from the Wiersbe text to reflect upon this problem of unanswered prayer. I have waken up many times in the middle of the night these past few weeks in discomfort from my knee and ankle pain. I have never ceased to pray for healing and yet the situation remains the same but at times is worse. I am taking pain medication with no relief. I tentatively have a job interview this week and don't know if I can physically make it there. God, through this particular trial seems to be silent and distant. This seems like an appropriate time to wrestle with this problem of unanswered prayer. The dilemma is described thus: "The question is a vexation to me because prayer is the one discipline in the Christian faith that makes us feel entirely dependent on God and thus sets us up for profound disappointment when God doesn't respond to our needs and requests" (Sittser, 2007). That is the problem and the paradox. Prayer makes us totally depend on God. Yet, at times we feel profound disappointment when God does not appear to be trustworthy and kind. When we come to God, we have an expectation that God is who He says He is. When He is not then can we still trust Him. How we respond to unanswered prayer will profoundly impact our spiritual journey.

"Why does God remain distant, silent, and hard when we call on him? If God doesn't respond when we need him most, then why pray at all" (Sittser, 2007). These are worthy questions that require real and honest answers.

I begin with chapter one titled: ARE YOU LISTENING, GOD? Sittser opens with this quote:

If many remedies are prescribed for an illness, you can be certain that the illness has no cure.

A. P. Chekhov, from The Cherry Orchard

I found this quote to be rather flawed in the assertion it makes. There can be many possible remedies for a given illness. That does not invalidate each individual treatment option and it certainly does not invalidate the options as a whole. I do however resonate with the pessimism in the comment.

Sittser opens this chapter with the description of an epic. An epic is a story in a film or novel that takes an enormous amount of time and involves many characters. An epic involves some kind of great mission. "However happy the ending, an epic often has a great deal of darkness in it tragedy, suffering, betrayal, and terrible sacrifice. There are strange twists and turns that leave us breathless as we wonder whether the characters will complete their quest. If anything, struggle is necessary to the nature of the story itself. The success of the quest becomes all the more meaningful because of the disappointments the characters experience along the way. The resolution comes as a joyful relief in the face of what once appeared to be unconquerable" (Sittser, 2007 p. 25). He opens this chapter with this description because prayer is an epic. We are promised that God ultimately is in control and we know the ending, but along the way there are many challenges, and many setbacks. I pause here to realize how important it is to keep the big picture in mind and not become overwhelmed at the present moment. God's kingdom will come. God's will will be done. What is difficult is that it does not come right away. So many of us operate on microwave Theology. God's time table isn't that way.

Sittser goes on to say that it would not matter so much if we did not take prayer so seriously. Prayer is woven into our daily life from the moment we wake up to the moment we go to bed. We pray when we have difficulty. We pray to give thanks. We pray to express adoration and wonder at God. We ask for wisdom and strength. Sometimes we pray out of habit. One of the complexities of prayer is stated here: "Prayer seems to work, too, which only makes the problem of unanswered prayer more bewildering. At least some of our prayers are clearly answered, often in Aston Facing

danger or difficulty, opportunity or challenge, we feel compelled to pray, even if we're not sure there is a God out there to whom we are praying. I have witnessed many answers to prayer over the course of the last twenty-five years. I have seen a young man healed of cancer (though his prognosis was like a death sentence hanging over his head); I have watched churches come alive, marriages restored, and mental health problems overcome. We may pray out of habit or as a reflex; but we also pray because we get results--at least some of the time" (Sittser, 2007 p. 27-28). Many of us can testify to this reality. I too, have seen cancer patients cured of cancer when family and churches have prayed for healing. I have seen marriages restored, wayward children come home, adults give up harmful addictions. This whole thing of prayer would not be such a dilemma had prayer not been effective in our lives.   

Sittser then makes mention of the conventional answer that we often hear in church. God answers all prayer. There is no such thing as unanswered prayer. He says yes to some and no to others. This makes sense. We can understand why God would say no to a teenager who asks for a BMW. I can understand why God would say no to a man who asks God to bless his extramarital affair. There are however the genuine challenges that include health, crisis, and work. What about the prayer for loved ones to come to faith. Does God not desire for people to come to faith? It is this very issue Sittser makes mention next.

"Bob Mitchell, former president of Young Life and former vice president of World Vision, preached a sermon in our church recently in which he quoted from a letter he received almost fifty years ago, in May of 1955. The letter was written by Jim Elliot, who had recently moved to Ecuador, with his young wife and baby daughter, to pioneer a new missionary outreach to the Auca Indians. The Aucas lived in a remote area and were considered hostile to outsiders.

Elliot expressed gladness that "the gospel is creeping a little farther out into this big no-man's land of Amazonia." He also mentioned a mutual friend and partner in the missionary endeavor, Ed, who had already left to make contact with the tribe. Expressing both excitement and foreboding, Elliot charged Bob Mitchell to pray for them, especially for Ed. "There are rumors that the same tribe is scouting around there now, so don't forget to pray for Ed--that the Lord will keep him alive as well as make him effective in declaring the truth about Christ." (p. 29).

Bob, as well as many believers prayed for this missionary team. They prayed for their protectection. They prayed for their work. Those of us familiar to this story know what happened to these missionaries. They were murdered by the very people they came to serve leaving Elizabeth a young widow and single mother. Does God not desire the protection of His workers and the salvation of souls? God appeared silent when these missionaries were senselessly slaughtered.

Sittser includes more examples of this dilemma of how ministry leaders, appearing to be doing the right thing, pastoring a church, all of a sudden have challenging circumstances within their own church. Pete and Shirley served faithfully the church for forty years and were now in their sixties. However, difficulty came to them:

But a small group of people launched a campaign against them. People betrayed them and made false accusations against them. The church became divided, a hostile place, a cancerous community. Pete and Shirley cried out to God. They prayed constantly and asked others to do the same. They fasted and claimed the promises of God. They begged for protection, vindication, and deliverance. "We remembered the deliverance of Joseph from prison, David before Goliath, Elijah on Mount Carmel, Daniel in the lions' den, Peter in prison. Our God was the same God. He would fight for us." But it became clear after a long battle that there would be no reconciliation and peace. So they resigned. Their fare well was like a funeral. Their losses overwhelmed them community, friendships, financial security, reputation. What surprised and bewildered them most of all, how ever, was God's silence. "God did not answer our prayers. Heaven was strangely silent, cold, distant, as if made of brass. It felt as if we knocked and pounded on the door of heaven until our knuckles were raw and bleeding, and still there was only silence. Why pray when all you get is silence?" (p. 31)

Heaven is silent. God seems cold. Faithfulness to God's work seemed fruitless and without purpose. The sad thing is when we claim God's promises and see how God delivers others in the Bible and find God does not help us in our time of need. The phrase "deliver us from evil" in the Lord's prayer is an example of God's will but we find that God does not deliver us from evil. Where is God when it hurts. Sittser does get his point across, thirty pages into the book about the problem. However, nearly a fifth of the way through, the hope of God does not shine through. We are still dwelling on the issue of unanswered prayer. Granted this is only chapter one, but some encouragement right now would be desired. Sittser provides the example of Eddie, a refugee. He desires to become a pastor in Africa. He applies for grad school and the only thing left is securing a visa. He tries not once, not twice, but three times but gets denied. So it is with us. We have hopes, dreams, and desires, we pray for God's help, leading, and blessing. Our plans do not succeed and we are left lost, stuck, and wondering where is God when we need Him.

Such moments can cause us to reject the very faith we once professed. C. S. Lewis lost his beloved mother at age nine. He prayed fervently for her healing. This profound loss caused him to reject the faith he once had until later in life when he came back to faith. Unanswered prayer can truly impact us spiritually.

Sittser has a major interest in this issue of unanswered prayer. In 1991, he lost his four year old daughter, wife, and mother in a car accident. So, for Sittser, and for many of us, we wrestle with real life events, real questions, deep hurts and endless reflections of who God is and why sometimes God does not seem to care. On p. 35, during this tragic accident, Sittser had some questions such as

Why are you praying?

What good will it do?

Well-meaning people provide responses that often do more harm than good. Responses such as:

"I believe that you have been set aside for some significant mission."

"God's ways are higher than our ways."

"You didn't pray with enough faith."

"Perhaps you had unconfessed sin in your life."

"I guess your prayers were not in accordance with God's will."

However, we are faced with the promises from Jesus in the Gospels when He states:

So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; those who seek find; and to those who knock, the door will be opened)

Very truly I tell you, all who have faith in me will do the works I have been doing, and they will do ever greater things than these, because I am going to the Father.

And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.

If we pray, God answers. Or so we are left to believe? We are left pondering what went wrong. Sittser's introspection caused him to wondering what went wrong. He proposes three answers. Something must be wrong with my motives. Something must be wrong with my faith. Or, I am using the wrong words.

"These explanations have merit; a grain of truth lies in all of them. Purity of motive is important and necessary. So is faith. So are the right words. I won't dispute any of this. Yet these explanations leave me cold, too, because I think they force needless introspection and lead to self-punishment. Does God only answer the prayers of perfect people, perfectly pronounced, uttered in perfect faith?" (p. 39).

Perfect faith. Perfect words. Perfect people. Something appears wrong here. I think when we face difficulties, then it leads us to answers that don't make much sense. This line of thinking is very self-inflicting and dangerous. On p. 40, Sittser begins to provide some rational response to irrational beliefs:

"Blaming ourselves contradicts the very reason we pray. We pray as fragile, broken people. It would strike me as impossibly demanding if we had to prove ourselves worthy of answered prayer by stellar performance, precise articulation, and unwavering faith." We pray because we are weak and God is strong. We pray because we are not perfect people with perfect faith. It would be a contradiction to be perfect and pray. We would have no need for God. But, we do need God.

"So what do we do if we know that we lack perfect faith? Calvin urges us to persist. Perfection is not required--only desire, persistence, and progress. "Although not freed of all hindrances, their efforts still please God and their petitions are approved, provided they endeavor and strive toward a goal not immediately attainable.''6

Jesus taught that just a little bit of faith--faith the size of a mustard seed--is all we need, which is his way of saying that quantity is not really the point. Only a little of faith is necessary so long as it is directed toward the right object, that is, toward God. In fact, faith is not really the main point. What matters is the one in whom we place our faith. Once we try to quantify faith, we misunderstand its nature. (p. 40).

I think sometimes we read portions of the gospels that say "your faith has made you well" and put such emphasis on the element of faith that we forget the person in who we place our faith. It is so encouraging that it is not about the quantity of faith, but the object of our faith. If only we have a mustard seed of faith. I have seen individuals pray to idols in their distress with no relief. Many people pray to different things in distress.

""Faith turns away from self and comes empty-handed to God. Faith doesn't believe in itself; it believes in God. It doesn't try to manufacture confidence in itself; instead, it turns to God. Faith implies that we bring nothing to God; it asks everything from God.

The worst thing we can do in the face of doubt is to stop praying, assuming--wrongly, I believe that only people with perfect faith can pray. We must dare to pray even as we doubt, just as the desperate father cried, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief" True faith is like a light that begins to flicker, however faintly, in the darkness of an experience that beckons us to pray even when we can hardly muster the faith to pray." (p. 41)

Prayer:

Father, as I come to the end of this chapter on unanswered prayer, I realize there are no quick answers to unanswered prayer. My prayer through this is that You would help my unbelief. Just as the father of the child impacted by demon possession prayed, help my unbelief. We often begin to have bad Theology when we face Your silence. The key from this chapter is to persist and not give up seeking You and turning to You when we feel like giving up. It's hard. My physical condition is not getting better even after seeking medical help. I have an interview on Thursday and don't even know if I can make it. I don't have the wisdom and power to handle this situation and so Father I turn to You for help and healing.

Seeing God in the Difficulties

It has been almost a week since my last entry here and comments on Wiersbe (2007). This week has been hard. I have been unable to walk up the stairs and sleep in my own bed. More often than not I have moderate discomfort in both knees.

I will take a moment to share a devotional I read today from Pastor Greg and share some things related to the last entry.

The last chapter was on the pure in heart. The result of this is being able to see God. Seeing God can mean many things that include seeing God's hand in circumstances both personal and global.

It has been a huge challenge these past few weeks coping with my joint pain and not knowing the cause or treatment. An X-ray was taken last Friday but I do not meet with my doctor until next Friday.

A common question I often wrestle with is why bad things happen. Not the bad things that are the result of bad behavior. If we smoke, there are consequences. If we hurt others, there are consequences. What I wonder about is the life difficulties that happen for no explainable cause.

I am a man with pre-existing defects. I was born with a rare eye condition known as optic nerve atrophy. I was born with a moderate speech impediment. Now, in these past three weeks, I now have joint pain and periodic inflammation with no known cause. I cannot conceive how God can do anything with my life.

Four weeks ago I had a phone screen for a social work position locally. That was prior to my joint problems. Even when I called to follow-up I did not expect anything and they never returned my follow up call. Never, until this afternoon. It was an interview request for next week.

The phone call was unexpected. Moreover, I am unsure if I can even physically make it to the interview. What these past few weeks are showing me are my significant weaknesses and total dependence on God. In the end, whatever good happens, all glory goes to Him. I don't know what will happen. My prayer has continued to be for God's leading, strength, and hope from day to day.

This is the devotional I came across: 

JUNE 1, 2012

Not Ability, but Availability 

"I am the Lord; that is my name! I will not give my glory to anyone else, nor share my praise with carved idols." 

—Isaiah 42:8

What kind of person does God seek to use? What qualifications is He looking for in someone? Is it a towering intellect? Is it natural leadership ability? Could God ever use someone who is a bit shy by nature? Does this person have to be very talented or handsome or beautiful?

The answer to all of these questions is clearly no. It seems as though God goes out of His way sometimes to choose the most unexpected people to use.

If I had to choose one passage of Scripture that I think best summarizes my life as a Christian, it would be 1 Corinthians 1:26–29, where the apostle Paul wrote,

Remember, dear brothers and sisters, that few of you were wise in the world's eyes or powerful or wealthy when God called you. Instead, God chose things the world considers foolish in order to shame those who think they are wise. And he chose things that are powerless to shame those who are powerful. God chose things despised by the world, things counted as nothing at all, and used them to bring to nothing what the world considers important. As a result, no one can ever boast in the presence of God.

There is not a person who had less promise to achieve anything with his life than me. I was literally the last person picked for the team for whatever sport it was. I never was academically strong. I always underwhelmed in most areas of my life. So when the Lord chose me to serve Him, it was very clear that it was His doing—not mine. This is because God will not give His glory to another.

As I have said before, God is not looking for ability as much as availability. Are you available to Him?

  

   

THE PURE IN HEART

Yesterday had to be one of the more difficult days in the past two weeks of knee pain. I would wake up in the morning with ankle pain in addition to knee pain. It would appear now that I have some serious problems with my joints. I have been told by several health professionals that it cannot be arthritis because I am too young for that, but now I just don't know. It is even more difficult to walk now. This section of the book becomes so much more relevant. How do I see God in my circumstances? Quoting the title of a different book, "Where is God When It Hurts?"

On the opening page of this chapter, Wiersbe (2007) opens with these words: "At some point in life, each of us must decide what is our highest joy, for the thing that delights us directs us. Generally speaking, children find their delight in what they have; youths in what they do; and adults in what they are. The first live for possessions, the second for experiences, and the third for character." (p. 113). That thing which delights us will direct us. I would like to take a moment and pause on each stage described here. Children delight in what they have. I can see this with the question I once heard a pastor ask a child what they want and the child said a Play Station video game unit. Youths find their delight in what they do. When I was in high school, and perhaps it is still true now, we have our various factions, the ones who play football, those on the debate team, those in marching band, those in student government, those who are popular, and so on. Finally, adults generally find their delight in who they are. This is when career and family goals are pursued. "I am an engineer". "I am a father". Yet, all these things, play station, debate team, engineer are temporal things. Our greatest joy must be found in something far more lasting. Wiersbe goes on to say outlook determines outcome and he gives the example of Abraham and Lot. Abraham looked up and saw God and His promise, Lot looked up and saw Sodom. Abraham became a friend of God, Lot a friend of the world. Abraham in the end gained everything, Lot lost everything. Wiersbe closes the chapter by saying our highest joy is to see God.

So when the Bible says to be pure in heart, what is Jesus saying? It is helpful to examine for a moment how the Bible describes the heart: "Sometimes the Bible uses the word heart to indicate the emotions. "Do not let your hearts be troubled" (John 14:1). "This can be nothing but sadness of heart" (Nehemiah 2:2). But the heart can also refer to the intellect. "Why do you reason about these things in your hearts?" (Mark 2:8 NKJV). Hebrews 4:12 (KJV) states that the Word of God is a "discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart." The heart also indicates the volitional function, the will. "But Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself (Daniel 1:8 KJV). Jesus admonished His disciples, "Therefore settle it in your hearts not to meditate beforehand on what you will answer" (Luke 21:14 NKJV)." (p. 114). Mind, emotions, and will, all describing the heart. The heart then according to the body is not this physical organ, but rather the inner person representing these different aspects.

So we have touched upon what the heart is, the second part is referring to the purity of heart. "The Lord looks at the heart" (1 Samuel 16:7). David was that man after God's own heart, not because he was sinless but because his heart was single. Saul was a double-minded man. He tried to fear the people and fear the Lord at the same time, and it could not be done. Saul worried about the outward appearance: "Please honor me before the elders of my people and before Israel" (1 Samuel 15:30). David sought no honor for himself but only for God. "Let my enemy pursue and overtake me," David prays in Psalm 7:5. "Let him trample my life to the ground and make me sleep in the dust." He closes that prayer with his desire that God alone might be glorified: "I will give thanks to the Lord because of his righteousness and will sing praise to the name of the Lord Most High" (Psalm 7:17). (p. 116). I think of when Jesus says that we cannot have two masters. We either serve one or hate the other. That particular text refers to God and money but the principle applies universally. We cannot love God and love the world. I love how Wiersbe says it does not mean we are sinless, for surely we cannot be sinless, but it means that our devotion to God is single, it is not conflicted or unfaithful. We seek to honor and worship God. If we read through the many Psalms of David, we truly find a man after God's own heart:

"I will praise you, O Lord, with all my heart" (Psalm 9:1).

"May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer" (Psalm 19:14).

"Test me, O Lord, and try me; examine my heart and my mind" (Psalm 26:2).

"My heart says of you, 'seek his face!' Your face, Lord, I will seek" (Psalm 27:8).

"My heart is stirred by a noble theme as I recite my verses for the king" (Psalm 45:1).

Jesus said, "Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks" [Matthew 12:34]) We see a man whose focus and delight was God and it came out in His poetry and it came out in his life. I would like to meet people like this. They are the most pleasant and God-centered people I see. Truly, it isn't easy to always have our delight and our focus on God.

Further describing the word purity, Wiersbe writes: "The word that is translated pure has two basic meanings: "clean" and "unmixed." Our English word cathartic comes from this Greek word. A cathartic is an agent a doctor uses to cleanse the physical system. A psychiatrist also uses catharsis on the emotional level to "cleanse" the patient of hostilities and other destructive attitudes. There is also a spiritual catharsis, a cleansing of the inner person. "He purifies their hearts by faith" (Acts 15:9) (p. 117). The idea here is something that is clean, unadulterated, pure.

Wiersbe gives the description of David when he did not have purity of heart. This instance was the sin of adultery. He did not go out to war when kings went out to battle. He saw a woman bathing and let that desire turn into an affair. The affair then led to the murder of her husband, and David lied about and tried to cover his deeds up. His heart and desire and honor was not God but himself and his physical gratification. Purity of heart requires honesty, with God, with others, and self always. It requires that we seek to honor God in all that we do.

How do we cultivate purity of heart, to have our heart desire God? "Psalm 86:11 explains it: "Teach me your way, O Lord, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name." No person can ever hope to see God whose heart is divided between the Lord and the world. Our relationship with God must be based on love. For our hearts to love anything other than God is to commit spiritual adultery. "You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God" (James 4:4) (p. 119).

There are several ways we can see God. God is seen in creation. "The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands"(Psalm 19:1). We see God also in the circumstances both of our lives and in the world. Paul's conviction was "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." (Rom 8:28).

"For they shall see God." This is the highest blessing possible for humans, for when we see God, we see Him who is (as the theologians put it) "the Source, Support, and End of all things." Since nothing is higher than God, then seeing God must be the highest joy that we can experience. It was this joy that motivated and excited men and women in Bible times and also inspired the great saints of church history. Moses prayed, "Now show me your glory" (Exodus 33:18). David wrote his heart's desire in Psalm 42:1-2: "As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?" Phillip said to Jesus, "Show us the Father, and it is enough for us" (John 14:8 NASB). Of course it was for this purpose that Jesus came, that He might reveal God to us. "Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father" (John 14:9). (p. 122).

Prayer:

Father, what an incredible honor it is to see God, to behold Your beauty and glory. That was the desire of Moses and David and so many others. This text says that the pure in heart will see God. That requires us to pray that You search our hearts, and teach us Your ways. It is so easy to desire lesser things and to be directed by lesser dreams. Today, as I continue to experience pain in my joints, my attention is on the pain I feel and not on the God who is bigger than my pain. I pray that for each of us distracted by pain, discomfort, broken dreams, and the many distractions in life, help us to keep our focus and our hearts pure and on You.